You got growin' up to do.

Growing up.

I have heard much about it from the time I began understanding a language and transplanting information from short-term to a space of a greater capacity within the depths of my mind. People enjoy discussing it, as if they understand what it requires of them; as if they understand what it demands of others. The idea is familiar to me. Grow up. This means I will be able to claim more inches. I only wish. Surprise surprise. Maximum height is not equivalent to growing up. I'm not sure anyone every completes the process. Growing up means something different for everyone. I believe that everyone has problems and pitfalls that may be eliminated by growing up. 1 Corinthians 13:11(NLT) "When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things." NAS says "..when I became a man, I did away with childish things." So, we have one way to define growing up. Maybe we should all become men. Too bad God created a second gender and liked it that way. Am I taking this out of context? No, I'm being abstract. Or maybe I'm being difficult and ridiculous. Probably. But mostly I'm taking it out of context. Bear with me.

At this point in my life, for me personally, growing up is meaning a lot of things. It is meaning to respect my authority in all circumstances. Check out Romans 13. A whole chapter dedicated to people having a problem with authority. God knew we'd need that chapter. Read it more than once. Authority. Respect. Respect when I believe they are being rash, ludicrous, or, when I simply do not understand. This doesn't single-out parents. This means teachers, bosses, leaders, and government too. I know that God selected these people to fill a position in my life. In respecting them, I am respecting God. Otherwise I am living out verse 3 of Obadiah, and screaming in the face of my Creator. (3)The pride of your heart has deceived you, you who live in the clefts of the rock, in your lofty dwelling, who say in your heart, "Who will bring me down to the ground?" News flash: God will. Oh hey, there's a verse for that. What's that? It just happens to be verse 4? (4)Though you soar aloft like the eagle , though your nest is set among the stars, from there I will bring you down, declares the Lord. Alright, I believe it necessary to draw attention to the fact that the Lord declares this. Don't mess with Him. Repect His plan.

Growing up is also meaning that college is near. Friends and families and families of friends and friends of those people and their families and their friends and basically everyone I know is nearing a fork in their little life road. Some friends have already left and others have little time until they move. In all honesty, this is the part that freaks me out the most. The realization that you are not a small child going through the motions of play anymore is unsettling. I don't want to grow up...but I do..but I don't....but really I do. This back and forth thought process is likely to cause motion sickness. Do not throw up in public. That is unattractive.

As I am learning about life and growing up I am realizing that nothing here is certain. I am realizing that all I can hold to is Jesus. Growing up comes in like a tornado. There are warnings, but let's get real: it's going to happen, regardless. So the tornado comes and picks everything up that you have. It takes it all, throws it around for a bit, causes a fair amount of damage, and then sets everything nicely back where it was found. Yeah right. The pieces of your life are now all over the world. Good luck finding them. So right now I'm being warned about this tornado and I know that it's out of my control. I don't know where my pieces will end up or if I'll ever find them again. I am okay with that. Really? Am I? Obviously that is a bold statement. It can't be true. Uhm, yes it can. Last time I checked, everything is possible with God. I didn't come to this point in my walk overnight. It has taken a long time and more doubt than I would like to admit. However, I can honestly say that I am okay with the aftermath of the tornado. People say that God is all they need, but I'm not sure that they ever fully fully fully believe it. I didn't. I've said my entire life that "God is in control." It was halfheartedly that I stated this. I didn't really trust God enough to say "take it all away." This time I'm serious. Take it all and give me more Jesus. I'm perfectly fine with that.


So basically I'm saying that my walk with God is perfect in every way and nothing will ever change that. Ha, wrong-o. What I am saying is that I trust Him. There will still be moments of second-guessing. I am sure of this. I am human. I am weak. I am learning. When your main focus is Jesus and you are going after Him with everything you possess, you will not be afraid. I am not afraid. This world has nothing for me. Give me Jesus. Proverbs 31:25 "She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future." I laugh and I giggle a lot. I do not fear the future. I would like to think that I am one tiny step further to becoming the Proverbs 31 woman for my husband, and ultimately for my Jesus.

"The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps." Proverbs 16:9

If you read all of this, I thank you and I applaud you. Reading is something of a lost art and you just demonstrated that there is hope for finding it again. Farewell, young heart.
Title inspired song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bLVbp3JqlrU

Come Friday

Curtain drenched in sunset.

Today I am tired. 

My eyes reek of fatigue and plead for rest.

Wake up little eyes, you have work to do. 

Please focus.

Shed the blur. 

Dress yourselves in clarity.

Little eyes, be alert!

Refrain from wandering.

I need you here. 

Little eyes, be careful.

Rose-colored glasses are deceptive.

Undesirable attire. 

Do not be fooled.  

Fix yourselves on things unseen.

A scavenger hunt for the eternal. 

Cleanse yourselves with purity.

Relief is on the way.

Little eyes, one more thing:

Turn to Jesus.

If tomorrow is Friday...

Then that makes today.....beautiful.

The Seventh of the Second Month

Waiting for summer.

Today.
How beautiful.
Minimal amount of sleep.
3 hour lab.
The vortex mixer machine thing.
^^Made me so happy.
Lots of lab giggles.
Much joy.
Jesus overwhelms me.
Hallway lunches with beautiful friends.
2 exams now behind me.
Gone forever.
Home alas.
Extreme fatigue.
Yard full of sunshine.
Homework awaits me.
Like a dreaded elixir that will be of benefit.
I must face it.
In due time effort will be valued.
You reap what you sow.
Sow thoroughly.
I will.
Rain comes later.
Say yes to thai<3
Joy still overflows.
Today is beautiful.

As oxygen is to your lungs, so time is to the world.

Time.

To define it..

Let's not. 

Definition would expire.

It cannot keep up.

Time never stops.

It moves fast.

It moves slow.

A definition would be a snapshot. 

A snapshot from the past.

Instantly old. 

We must describe it.

Time is personal. 

Time is universal.

Everyone has time. 

Different amounts.

None the same. 

Do not waste it.

You need to be told once more.

Do not waste it.

I beg you.

Time is precious.

You are granted no more time than what you possess right now.

Additions aren't an option. 

Extra time composes the air.

Oxygen.

You need this.

Remember.

Breathe.

Time is fickle. 

You cannot predict it.

Time is its own master.

It makes the rules.

Everyone follows.

The world is lost without it.

As oxygen is to your lungs, so time is to the world.

Time is big.

Do not be afraid of time.

It has no authority over you. 

But time rules the world, you say.

Read your own words.

Oh child, you do not understand. 

Time does rule the world.

Indeed, it does.

I am sure of it.

You make no sense.

Listen. 

I have something to tell you. 

Listen.

You are not of this world.

This world is dark.

You, my child.

You are of Light.

Oh, how great is this news!

I do not understand.

Listen to Me.

Why are you celebrating?

You make no sense. 

Listen, my child. 

Your words. 

They are too many.

Meaningless speech.

Listen to me.

Take heart.

Whose heart?

For I have overcome the world. 

Have you forgotten time?

You make no sense. 

My child.

Listen to me. 

But you make no sense.

It is merely that you do not understand.

If only you would listen.

Please listen.

I will try. 

Forgive my distracted mind.

Focus, my child. 

Focus on Me.

Listen.

I have overcome the world. 

From beginning to end.

I have overcome it. 

Do you know what lies between beginning and end?

Do not answer.

Only listen.

I will tell you.

Time.

It fills the gap.

I have overcome it. 

You have me.

You are mine. 

I am greater.

You now understand.

This news! 

It is good!

My heart.

It rejoices.

We celebrate!

We celebrate! 

May I ask you something?

Please ask Me. 

Where is time now?

It is underneath my feet.

I do not understand.

Without time...

What is there?

Eternity. 

I do not understand.

You were not created to.

What do I do?

Trust me.

Do you trust me?

I do.

God chose me.

Tonight was the candlelight service at church.
The traditional Christmas Eve:
Get the fam to church, sing some Christmas songs, light a candle, go home.
For me it wasn't so traditional this year.
God really spoke to me.
I believe it had everything to do with me choosing to listen.
Rather than grudgingly singing Christmas songs, I listened to them.
I savored every word.
Let me tell you this:
that's some good stuff.

Pastor Tony then spoke and identified us, as normal people, with the shepherds.
He said that they were outcasts.
They were outsiders and began to act that way by living ungodly lives.
We are the shepherds.
He didn't stop there, leave us feeling gross, and send us home though.
The last time I checked every nativity scene has a couple shepherds hanging around.
They didn't just decide to drop in because they heard a kid crying.
They were chosen.
God shined a light down from heaven and He chose them.
They followed His light and were lead to a King.
I've heard many times that we are like the shepherds blah blah.
But tonight, I listened.

A video was played that showed the journey of Mary & Joseph.
It showed the journey of the wisemen.
It also showed the journey of the shepherds.
That's us.
There was a part in the video where it showed the star shining its light down to the shepherds.
It was simple and powerful.
I am so undeserving.
My Jesus is so great.
All I am is a nasty, gross, disgusting, terrible shepherd.
God said, "I chose you."
I cried.

We are shepherds.
We are gross.
God chose us.
Why wouldn't we make our journey and follow Him?
Would we not want to leave our sheepish baggage for something greater?
I don't understand why we want to hang around in the fields.
God chose us.
We should be more than happy to follow the light God shines for us.
It's a journey for sure.
An adventure.
It'll be hard.
But He'll guide you the entire way.
The end of our journey is the best part.
We meet our King.
Our Lord.
God.
Jesus.
Follow Him now.
God chose you.

Obviously there were candles involved in the "candlelight service"
They were bright.
When all were lit the sanctuary was glowing in a beautiful way and we sang Silent Night.
So many candles.
It was glorious.
Our God is glorious.
We may have thought that our candles were bright but this is where it gets better:
The glory of God shines brighter than 10,000 suns.
Wow.

"And the shepherds returned glorifying and praising God for all they had heard and seen, as it had been told to them." Luke 2:20

Worship Him this Christmas.

Aquariums are nifty.

Yesterday I embarked on an adventure with my family.
We went to the aquarium.
As always, it was magical.
It looked a little like this:

Parties of Pomegranate.

Last night two best friends and I had a pomegranate party.
How does one have such a party?
This is how: 

cards&snuggles

Recipe for a Pomegranate Party:

• get friends. you need these.
• Papa Murphy's Pizza. Mighty Murphy's...no.
• hang with extended fam...(optional)
• visit friend while babysitting. deliver pizza&pomegranate. meet kids. 
• immaturely jump out of car. run after friends car. you need the exercise. 
• back home. eat pomegranate seeds. main event. party isn't over yet. 
• sing along to Disney songs on the wii. add your own solo if you're feelin it. reach for the stars.
• make hot chocolate and russian tea to soothe the now worked vocal chords. 
• play Harry Potter Uno. get too competitive with self-made rules. dumbleeedoreeee. 
• watch Hot Rod. #win
• "go to bed"-bash each others hopes, dreams, and personality types.
• sleep
• daylight donuts. yes. thank you, Jamie. 

This is all you need. Enjoy.